The dictionary according to Spabbit – Volume 4 – UK to USA edition

NSFW! (Lots of swearing!) There have been loads of these types of articles drifting around the interwebs recently, however I feel they’ve all lacked a certain guttural directness, and have overlooked the darker side of the colloquial language used in the UK.

  • Cunt – Cunt, it’s pretty universal, right? Nah, you can have a bad cunt, such as a politician, or traffic warden, or a good cunt such as a best friend. “What the fuck, you old cunt, not seen you in ages, what you been up to?” Such a line would normally be spoken in a pub (Bar). What’s really interesting with Cunt is that it’s losing the impact it once had, and some of the lesser swear words are beginning to take the mantle. Language is an evolving beast, and can never be pinned down for long 😄
  • Cunt – whilst we’re on the subject of Cunt – anatomically it’s a vagina aka fanny aka ethereal meat cave; ironically also known as a twat. Continuing on the same – arse, bottom, bum – often referred to by Americans as Ass, or Fanny. Don’t make the mistake is confusing Fanny with Arse in the UK, it’d be a bit of a shitty situation.
  • Fucker – Fucker, again as with Cunt it’s universal, Fucker can be good or bad entirely dependent on immediate context, I’ll leave the individual situations to your dank and fetid imaginations.
  • Wanker – Inconsiderate, bombastic, and often openly sexist individual, probably a man – such an individual will often have delusions of grandeur and an inflated sense of self worth. Best ignored in most cases, told to fuck off if becoming annoying. Can often be found driving Audi & BMW cars in the UK* (*Anecdotally according to many other drivers).
  • Tosser – Wanker without the vitriol, a want to be Wanker – irrelevant in all ways – may be either ignored or told to fuck off. May be found driving their car like it’s an Audi or BMW, but they ain’t rich enough to get a real one – a failed Wanker.
  • Twat – Wanker-plus. Like a wanker, but worse, they need to fuck off right from the start. Also used to describe the act of punching – “I’m gonna twat that motherfucker!”.
  • Cock-Womble, Cunt-Muffin – Twat-plus-plus. Yup, avoid or punch them in the face at the first opportunity…
  • Public School Boy (Cock-Womble, Cunt-Muffin), usually found trying to pretend they’re a decent human, where as they’re actually a politician, and have as much an idea of how to run the country and what the people want, as a polar bear wants to smash (Eat whilst drunk) in the local tandoori (Curry restaurant) on the average Friday night.

Also see: Spabbitisms… Expanding the language in all the wrong ways!, The Dictionary According to Spabbit – Volume 2 – Fucking ruining the language! ,& The Dictionary According to Spabbit – CUM SpecialWho said this site was’t all inclusive?!) 😉

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