Category Archives: #DIY

IKEA, a piss poor experience – no fucks given…

IKEAIKEA… It’s like Marmite, either love it or hate it, there is no middle of the road here – but either way IKEA is a necessary evil of the world, like Argos, and sometimes there’s no other way.

We’ve used IKEA (The Cardiff Store) many times over the years, and had varying degrees of service from the staff, but this latest visit has been the worst yet, and I sincerely hope that IKEA will not be a part of my future for as long as I can foresee. Normally when visiting IKEA, you can actually get away without interacting with the staff, completely if you use the self-service tills, but sometimes there is no avoiding the ordeal…

Counting the problems (Circles of Hell)…

First problem: Lack of staff – they’re like rocking-horse-shit, and when you do find one, they’re either in the wrong department, or some fucking idiot is taking up their time with pointless questions.

Second problem: When you do find an IKEA Peon, and they’re busy with an idiot asking idiot questions, there is no way they can call another peon over to save half hour of your life. No way at all, no fucks given.

Third problem: Some products, seemingly at random, don’t have an isle location, but have to be ordered via the IKEA Peons – no way to avoid them. Why?!

Fourth problem: They don’t give a fuck. That’s right, no fucks given in IKEA. How do I register for IKEA Family to get a discount – use that orange machine over there, no other help, no fucks given

Fifth problem: Orange machine is broken, not printing out… go find the peon, tell them, they reply “Go use another one”… Not the slightest sign of the peon moving to put a an “Out Of Order” sign on the machine, no fuck all. Roll on all the other poor bastards wasting their time. No fucks given.

Sixth problem: Broken discount system at the tills. Have to call a senior peon who can’t do anything, passing to yet another more senior peon – the senior peon takes an age to get the order processed.

Seventh problem (Read: “Gate of Hell”, but slightly less pleasant): After half hour waiting for my order to be picked, I’m still waiting.

Eighth problem (Read: “Wonder of IKEA-HELL”): After a half hour wait for the products to be picked, and a complaint to the senior-senior peon, they still can’t find my shit, the shit I’ve paid for, it’s mine, give it to me.

Ninth problem: (There are more circles of IKEA-HELL than any other hell): NO Offer of anything when complaining, no apology, no compensation for my wasted life-time they’d just used up being useless, NOTHING… IKEA: No Fucks Given.

… Just as a point, the above article details my own true-to-life experience, and my own opinions – don’t on any account be put off IKEA by the above review – google it for yourself 🙂

bedroomfurnitureworld.co.uk and XDP, xdp.co.uk

One word: CLUSTERFUCK. What a complete nightmare I had dealing with these two.

To be fair though, compared to XDP, BedroomFurnitureWorld weren’t too bad.

The issue: Complete lack of communication.

– I ordered around £700 worth of furniture from BedroomFurnitureWorld.

The first problem was that I didn’t receive a confirmation from the order until I called them the following day and nagged.

Second problem, their choice of courier – XDP.

XDP – WORST EVER EXPERIENCE I’ve had when dealing with a delivery.

When they didn’t turn up on the appointed day, I couldn’t get hold of the buggers, the number they give you, 0843 178 2222 simply isn’t answered, I can now understand why – they’re COMPLETELY USELESS. Eventually my wife found a number from them on a complaint forum somewhere on the interweb – 0843 178 5555 (USE THIS ONE if you have to contact these “people”), at least that number got answered, and after several nagging phone calls we got somewhere, the second day of chasing.

Anyhow, the first day, the appointed day of delivery – We’d both taken the day off work to receive this delivery, we were told it could be any time between 08:00 and 18:00 (NO convenient window of delivery from them)… Come 16:00 I call XDP, or try to, as above, and can’t get through!; so I call the company, BedroomFurnitureWorld, they manage to get hold of XDP in a few minutes and call me back… As it turns out, this bunch of cowboys were “too busy” to deliver our consignment and couldn’t be bothered letting us know. That’s right COULDN’T BE BOTHERED, meaning their customers don’t mean shit to them. Further information from the operator from BedroomFurnitureWorld reveals that the XDP depots are largely unmanned, so once the drivers collect their deliveries in the morning, from a customer perspective, you’re royally screwed if you need to contact the cowboys.

On the return call from BedroomFurnitureWorld, they refunded the grand total of £19.99 for the delivery fee (I’ve yet to see this a week later – they say it can take 2 weeks – yet somehow they can TAKE money from you INSTANTLY), and apologised for XDP’s piss-poor performance. A third call and they’d magically booked in a Saturday delivery (The original was on a Friday), when XDP don’t do Saturdays.

Saturday comes. No sign of the cowboys in the morning. Tried calling BedroomFurnitureWorld again – no contact – “Customer Services” simply aren’t on a weekend (Read: FAIL). This is where we spend three hours googling the shit out of XDP – As it turns out, they’re widely known as scumbags all over the interwebs. WISH I’d known that BedroomFurnitureWorld used XDP and what XDP were like before ordering, really.

After the three hours of googling, we get a response (YaY!) from them – and they promise to deliver in the afternoon, which was actually completed. I’m still of the opinion that if not for the constant stream of phone calls from us on Saturday to XDP that we’d still be waiting, and be down £700 for furniture.

Anyhow, I e-mailed BedroomFurnitureWorld regarding the sham which is their choice of courier, XDP, and they e-mailed back two days later with an empty apology.

The point of this RANT is DON’T use ANY company which use XDP, if you do, in my opinion only, you’ll be damn lucky if you get your goods on schedule, or at all.

Just as a point – for a disclaimer – this is my own true-to-life experience, and all my own opinions, if you read this, then please go google BedroomFurnitureWorld and XDP for yourselves, and make up your own mind – all the information you need is out there already; don’t be put off, on any account, by my experience.

The Furniture!

As mentioned in the last post, we’ve spent some of the money on new furniture – namely a new ottoman for the front room, and a complete load of Bedroom Furniture, yes, complete with capital letters!

The stuff replaced in the bedroom is as follows:

1 Bed – CheapISH pine bed replaced with a Solid Mango-Wood bed!
   Bed

2 Bedside Cabinets – Office drawers replaced with 2 Oak bedside cabinets with three draws a piece.

2 Chests of Drawers – Solid pine.
   Drawers

1 Four door Wardrobe – Again, solid pine.
   Wardrobe

Total cost for the bedroom has been around £1,200 – cheap when you consider all we’ve got for it…

Flat Pack

(Yes, in BOLD) In bold because it was EPIC. The wardrobe came in three massive boxes and the draws in a box per set, epic self assembly was not mentioned on the website, yet it was the case – FIVE hours for two of us to put together the wardrobe! NONE of the parts were labelled – all guesswork 🙁 BUT it is one hell of a piece of furniture now fully built and filled with our clothes.

The Drawers, in comparison were a piece of piss – only (sic) two hours per set!

Anyhow… now for the Bed. The Bed had only just been delivered today, and is still in two massive and monstrously heavy boxes! The plan is to leave it boxed until the weekend, when, on Saturday I’m going to take a saw to the old bed and get rid of it in lumps (I’m not even going to entertain the idea of trying to take it apart normally!); once the old bed has been disposed of, we’ll unpack and build the new one. I’m thinking the whole task will take around two hours – fingers crossed!